Thoughts of the Day

damai yang sejati bukanlah ketika yang terjadi pada kita adalah yang kita inginkan. Damai yang sejati adalah ketika kita berkata pada diri sendiri bahwa dalam situasi yang terburuk di mana kita tidak bisa menyenangkan semua orang, Tuhan tetap ada dan tetap mengasihi kita karena segala sesuatunya tidak direncanakan untuk membuat berpikir bahwa kita tidak dikasihi.God loves us the way we are.

Chirp chirp

untitled

though I still have many areas to improve myself in, I love myself the way I am, no matter how people see it. I feel content receiving love from the people who know me best--God and myself.

This is quite fun

YOU
001. Real name ? Yossy Hanna Garlina
002. Like it? Sure I do. Its unique.
003. Nickname(s)? Ochie. Seldom got nicknames.
004. Status ? single
005. Zodiac sign ? virgo
006. Male or female ? Female
007. Elementary? SD Santa Angela
008. Middle School ? Aloysius, SCGS
009. High School ? Nanyang JC
010. Hair color ? brown with gold streaks
011. Long or short ? bob
012. Eye color ?grey
013. Weight ? dont remind me please
014. Height ? 165 cm
015. Righty or lefty ? righty
016. Loud or Quiet ?  loud
017. Sweats or Jeans ? jeans
018. Phone or Camera ? phone
019. Health freak ? in the process
020. Piercings? yeap
021. Do you have a crush on someone? pleasseeee. Am trying to forget.
022. Eat or Drink ? drink
023. Purse or Backpack ? purse
024. Tattoos ? mad-
025. Do You Like Yourself? Now? Yes
026. Current worry? ? Uni works, assignments, event tasks, weight management, relationship management

THIS OR THAT
027. Orange or Apple Juice?  orange
028. Night or Day? ? night
029. Sun or Moon? ? sunshine sweater
030. TV or Internet? internet. No TV in my room
031.PlayStation or XBox? i prefer magazine
032. Kiss or Hug? Hug. Big hug
033. Iguana or Turtle? Hamster
034. Spider or Bee? Tarantula
035. Fall or Spring? Musim ujan
036. Limewire or iTunes? Laptop
037. Soccer or Baseball? Swimming (okay I defies a lot hahaha)

FIRSTS
038. First surgery ? dun have
039. First piercing ? ears
040. First best friend ? ldin remember
041. First Sport? running
042. First award ? meaning?
043. First crush ? adalah anak SD
044. First pet ? Cats
045. First big vacation ? Bali
046. First big birthday ? the ones in Singapore. They are all too memorable to be forgotten.

CURRENTLY
047. Eating ? fruits and veggies. Til I go mad.
048. Drinking ? pure mineral water
049. I'm about to ? manage my anger
050. Listening to ? Lady Gaga
051. Singing? Sometimes
052. Typing? Blogging to be exact
053. Waiting for ? the time to bathe

YOUR FUTURE
054. Want kids? Iya dong
055. When? yah kalo married lah
056. Want to get married? mau lah. asal jangan sekarang
057. When? gila aja lo
058. Where Do You Want To Live? New York
059. Careers in mind ? business in fashion and make up industry
060. What Did You Want To Be When You Were Little? doctor
061. Mellow Future Or Wild?  Wild
062. Something You Would Never Try? premarital sex

WHICH IS BETTER WITH GUY?
063. Lips or eyes ? eyes
064. Shorter or taller?  much taller.
065. Romantic or spontaneous ? romantic
066. Nice stomach or nice arms ? arms
067. Sensitive or loud ? moderate
068. Hook-up or relationship ? relationship
069. Trouble maker or hesitant ? moderate
070. Hugging or Kissing? hugging
071. Tan Skinned or Light? light
072. Dark or Light Hair? dark
073. Muscular or Normal? moderate

HAVE YOU EVER
074. Lost glasses/contacts ? a week ago
075. Ran away from home ? nope
076. Held a gun/knife for self defense? scarily yes
077. Killed somebody ? yeah.
078. Broken someone's heart ? How can I know
079. Been arrested ? No
080. Cried when someone died ? A lot of times
081. Kissed A Stranger? crazy
082. Climbed Up A Tree? ? nope
083. Liked A Friend As More Than A Friend? ? hhhh. Trust me it doesn't work.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN
084. Yourself ? Am believeing. Still in the process
085. Miracles ? Sometimes
086. Love at first sight ? Not really
087. Heaven ?Yes
088. Santa Claus ? No comment
089. Kiss on the first date ? A strict no.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY
090. Is there one person you want to be with right now ? Hey I'm managing my anger now.
091. Do You Like Someone? Now? to be honest yes. But I am putting my best effort in my entire 22 years to remove the feelings coz I really do want to restore our friendship.
092. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life ? lately? YES!
093. Do you believe in God ? Yeap

LASTS
094. Recieved/Sent Text Message ? fajar
095. Received Call ? mom
096. Call Made? mom
097. Comment On MySpace? no myspace account
098. Missed Call? hah.
099. Person You Hung out With? A lot lately

Acrylicious

Anyway, I forgot to post the later parts of my clay project. So the clay project was followed by acrylic plates project, which is, in a nutshell, transferring the core concept of the clay model into a similarly-volumetric structure.

 

I'm a student of an anger management class

This blog was intended to be fully a sketch blog. But later this year I found out that my personal life is giving myself more ideas to be written than any interesting object.

I always had problems with self-control. Stress management, self-confidence, anger management, you name it. I always had people telling me that if, I repeat, if I control myself slightly better then I would be able to achieve things in life better. A good friend came up to me today and said that if only I can control myself better I can be a better debater. That shakes me a little bit. I mean, I was asking myself : Again?

And these few days I discovered more reasons no less astounding: I've always been an angry person. Be it with other people, and, myself. So I figured I need an anger management skills to prevent myself from being a short-fused dynamite.

All these anger thing can be connected to my lifelong personal insecurities. I've always felt insecure about anything. And when bad circumstances have frictions with my inner self, I explode and release the anger via different conduits. When I'm angry at people, I release it on myself. When I'm angry at myself, I again release it on myself. And I too release the anger on others. A total time bomb ticking.

But I don't need a spiritualist to tell me that I'm getting tired of all these. I need to fix things up before my life becomes a complete wreck. Now or never.

It's like what Sue Sylvester once said : You know, I’m tired of hearing people complain, “I’m riddled with THIS disease” or “I was in THAT tsunami.” To them I say, “Shake it up a bit! Get out of your box! Even if that box happens to be where YOU’RE LIVING!” I’ll often yell at homeless people, “Hey! How’s that homelessness working out for ya? Give NOT being homeless a try, eh!”

Merry Christmas!

peace is always from within. Relying on external peace is not only temporary, it corrodes the human internal ability to control.
 -Yossy Hanna-

Reflection of the day-productive me time

To be irritated due to an unappreaciative treatment is a hazardous sign of personal insecurities. The only way to banish these insecurities is by appreciating ourselves, even before anyone does, such that our thirst of appreciation is quenched internally.

-Yossy Hanna-

Another famous quote--by me

The best peaceful way to take revenge on someone who hurt you so bad is just to survive and be better than him.

-Yossy Hanna-

The truth stinks.

I'm a rubber ball. I rebound when someone hits me.

I'm perfectly happy. And angry. That makes me revengeful.

Reminisce Part 1

Its 12:41 am and I'm reminiscing over my architecture days. Same time last year, I was back in Indo doing some random stuff and (partly) cursing myself of not being just a simply decent girl so that I didn't end up stateless and school-less. Period. Anyway, there is nothing I treasure more (in terms of things I created) other than the models I made in my design classes. I lurrrvveee them so much I want to kiss them everyday (lebay mode: on). I don't care if people think that those models are funny pieces of crap or they are just statements of my pathetic inner desire to be an artist or something. If you made something out of your heart I bet you'll love it with your soul. Try it and believe it.

Anyway these are the models, they are of chronological order. Meaning that, the order of construction is from the earliest to the latest.
The first one is from clay, a 3D construction from two-dimensional sketches.

The loading is mega long. Shall continue tomorrow. *Yawn*

I'm such a copy-person

This old drawing is buried in my digital pile of drawings (aka my drawing file lah LOL). I directly copied it from a professional sketcher's published sketch book since it's so simple yet mesmerizing...I can feel an intense sense of emptiness in it..so gloom and so....gloom.

Face Off

Hari ini entah gua yang ga ada kerjaan (boong banget) ato gua tiba-tiba jadi blogger yang super produktif (walopun isinya gambar smua sih hehehe). Jadiii karna saia tidak bisa menggambar muka orang secara utuh, saya memutuskan untuk belajar menggambar bagian2nya sebagai langkah awal. I really wish in a few months time I'll be able to draw some basic faces, then I'll move on to on the spot face drawing (which is still a looong loooong way to go). So I started off with ears,

and then with nose and an eye,

I'll follow through with some other face components. Fun drawing journey!!

Cheetah, I miss you so :(

Aku Ini Jendela Surga

Aku ini jendela surga
Berhias kaca penanda sukma
Bertalikan waktu, bermega ungu
Ku duduk di antara ruang-ruang
Bertanya bersenda pada malaikat
Beruang berinti pada kesucian
Menangisi manusia kenal pahit lelah
Aku tak lekang oleh waktu
Hatiku belahan hati dewa
Dan wajahku cerminan ratu angkasa
Aku bermanis madu pada kesepian
Dan bertawar hati pada kedurhakaan
Tertutup, hampa, aku ini

I am no strong girl

I'm trying to be a strong girl
I'm trying to be immune
To things I can't refuse

I'm pushing myself
To be someone I'm not
Just like everyone else
And when I talk to myself
I found out I'm no supergirl
I am the world but myself
Revolving around a circle so vague
I let her go off my hand
My old self is missing
She's trying so bad to be strong
Yet she becomes someone else
She's just a blurred vision in my head
I'm recalling her, can't
Who are you Yossy?
You are just a blurred vision in my head

Shoes, shoes galore!!!

 

 

 

 

 

As much as I appreciate works of art, I adore the magnificence of colours combination and textures of fabric in shoes. They are just...ooohhhhh-someeeeeeee

In love with platform heels--sigh...

How to survive a rejection

Gua emang bukan orang yang sangat bijak ato sangat sensitif sampe bisa come up with wise words every day. Tapi apa yang gua alamin cukup buat gua belajar beberapa hal. Yang pertama, tentang rejection. I now realize that the only way to survive a rejection is to rise up as a much stronger person. There is no, and ultimately, no other way to survive this sort of condition. Gua mikir, knapa gua bisa sedih gara2 rejection, dan alasannya, as stupid as it may sound (but I am too sure dat a gazzillion of people out there are feeling the same as me), is because I feel that I am not good enough in everything I did. Gua jadi ngerasa sangat worthless dan feeling yang kaya gini kilss all forms of confidence and creativity I must say.

Gua jadi ga pd ngapa2in, gua kadang2 jadi ngerasa bego banget and so on and so forth. While, the truth is, it might not be true at all! I came accross this website about surviving a rejection and it did a lot to my personal security.

Pertama2, gua disuruh ngelist apa aja kelebihan gua. Dan setelah itu gua disuruh ngeliat bahwa the statement dat I am a worthless person is not true. Well I did, and it did more to me. Not only I realized that I actually have many talents and gifts, I also realize that I've never really looked to my virtues and talents to realize that I am a person worth of love. It was a big slap for me but I now see that there is no point in comparing myself to others as I am unique in every way I do.

The next step was to indoctrinate this statement into my deepest part of mind :

That the person whom God avails for me is not going to reject me.

Whoa. That's quite a mouthful to digest.

But seriously, it turns the way I see relationship. It's not  about me going to force someone to love me back or vice versa, but it's about finding the one that has the built-in potential to love me unconditionally. As cheesy as it may sound, it is true. And I choose to believe that it is true as I do not want to dwell in this ongoing circle of surviving rejection anymore. I, once and for all, declare that to find the right one I should not dwell too much in pointless hoping. It frees me in some way. Happy :)

Melancholy of my first semester college love---Super gombal, but accurate, love quote

Words describe better than facial expression:

Ask me why I keep on loving you when it's clear that you don't feel the same way for me.The problem is that as much as I can't force you to love me, I can't force myself to stop loving you.

Nothing hurts more than realizing that he meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to him.

The worst way to love someone is to sit next to them, knowing they don't love you back.

Sometimes you think you've gotten over a person, but when you see him smile you suddenly realize you're just pretending you're over him to ease the pain of knowing that he will always only be your friend.

I don't miss him, I miss who I thought he was

I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry, I’m going to let you go in style, and even if it kills me - I’m going to smile.

You know you love someone when you want them to be happy even if their happiness means that you're not part of it.

Brand wad...logo, banner or wad??

 I'm working on my online fashion boutique, and I've been thinking about this name FabriCella A LOT lately.
I know that an online store should not be necessarily a well-thought one since it is still a starting business,but stillllll I really wanna put my extra-personal touch in it. Like wad people always say, always do what you love to do hehehe

another happy shoes :)

http://wondershoe.com/assets/timthumb/timthumb.php?src=catalog/X_202.jpg&h=240&w=320&zc=1

goodness-i need to have these

Wizzzzz List

I've posted this list before in my previous blog but since this my best wish list ever so I decided to put it up here.

So, my wishes (in chronological order) are:

1. Get good GPAs (aka IPS and IPK in Indonesian universities) for the next 3.5 years
2. Get an opportunity to have my internship in a multinational company, or, if God allows, in an overseas company
3. Graduate in 3.5 years with a very good academic performance
4. Master English for communication and get good enough TOEFL score for me to bag a job in a multinational company
5. If God allows, receive a Graduate Scholarship Award from a respected overseas university
6. Able to use Chinese Language to carry out daily conversations
7. Travel around the world with my beloved parents
8. To reach my ideal weight (**blush**)
9. Settle down
10. Own a restaurant, my own clothing, cosmetic and jewelry line, and make it successful ones!

And these are the things I’ll buy when I get ridiculously rich:

1. A white grand piano
2. A black jaguar and Mercedes
3. MAC Company (as in, I want the company to be under my leadership)
4. A pink private jet
5. A mansion in UK
6. Another mansion in USA
7. Another mansion in Japan
8. Another mansion in Singapore
9. Countless houses all over Indonesia
10. A small home in Dago, Bandung, as my first option for my holiday getaway

And I’ll design every single house myself! It’s sort of…you know, revenge, coz I didn’t even finish my 1^st semester in the architecture course… Sniff >_<

Next is list of people who inspire me the most:

1. My grandparents
2. My parents
3. John C Maxwell
4. Michelle Obama
5. Barack Obama (see that Michelle comes before Barack---Girl, eh salah, woman power!)
6. Professor Johannes Widodo
7. Francis DK Ching
8. Mrs Tinjung Desy Nursanty

7 Things I love

1. Spending my whole day sketching random things
2. The colour pink (and its related colours in the family)
3. Musky fragrance
4. Clothes, shoes, accessories, you name it.
5. A nice cup of coffee
6. Being with my circle of friends
7. Talking

Man made Madness

Inspired by the ever-wanted Taylor Lautner of the newly-hyped romance movie New Moon, I decided to draw something out of this inspiration, anddd (call me jablay or wad i dun care) there's nothing that describes him better than a perfectly-sculpted male figure hehehehe

Anyway, I love my friends so much. Love u guys :)